I got lost and you couldn’t find me
I saw a large crocodile’s jaws behind me
I ran for cover and got chased in the dark
You searched high and low with a glowing spark
I’d been lost for 30 years
I became wild, wizened and full of tears
Living each day on berries and small crustaceans
Wandering aimlessly with the constellations
You searched for weeks and you searched for months
When all I had was my shades and my holiday swimming trunks
The radar picked up ships and planes, still I was not found
While I survived in the forest, making no sound
Left alone without the ticking of a clock
My mind went fuzzy and my thoughts ran amok
Until an alien hired the nose of a fat sniffer-dog
When all the world feared I had demised in a bog
Soon I was detected in a deep dark trench
You wouldn’t have believed the stench!
Then I was taken to a far off planet
Quizzed, then prodded and fed like a gannet
In the caves of a strange place made of sparkling dust
Until my captors had had enough
They flew me home and now I’m all scrubbed-up
I really can’t believe my luck
I’m calling now to let you know I’m here
I’ve shaved my beard and cut my hair
So please come and visit and I’ll fill your cup
Come when you wish and come made-up
Because I’d like to meet and talk a while
Just please don’t mention the crocodile!
© Sean P. Ransom 18/8/2020